I'm Reading Again

So the place where I used to live in Portland was kind of a mess, but it was one block away from a cupcake store and two blocks from a movie theater that served beer, which is probably the closest I'll ever come to my own version of manifest destiny. It's where I wrote Apathy, and it's also where I found a dead rat in my garbage can the night I came home from that trip I took and then got evicted. And yeah the reason I'm getting nostalgic is I have a reading this Tuesday, the 14th, in Powell's on Burnside at 7:30 pm. It's right down the street from my old apartment and it's one of my favorite bookstores in the world, so the fact that I'll be reading in there is kind of ridiculous. If I was a different person I'd say it was special, but I really don't have that kind of sincerity in me. I like to save up all my emotions for hockey season.

I'm only blowing through town--I have to get back because my sublet is up in Berkeley at the end of the week and I need to move my stuff out and find another place to live, and I also have to get a job and all this other nonsense I'd rather not think about--but after the reading I'm going to head over to the Low Brow Lounge and hope some people come with me so I can mooch drinks off them. They have Guinness on tap and hot pretzels, which will probably end up being my dinner unfortunately, so if you're in Portland come on by and say hello............Paul

Comments

[Mark]

Portland, Maine?

[Graham]

Oregon.

Apparently you could have ordered signed copies of your book from Powell's website.
I did a a few days ago, I don't see the link anymore. Feel free to spit on my book when Powell's forces you at gun point to sign it.

G

[Michelle]

Come do a reading in Phoenix next. I'll come out and hear you read and probably end up buying you a hot pretzel. No rain here, even though nothing compares to Powell's.

[Devin]

I wish i could come, I love pretzels and I really love guinness. I hope you find a new place with minimal effort. I'm also very glad to hear you like hockey and or play it, or was that just a funny comment?

[hilary]

dear paul,

i wanted to e-mail you privately to tell you that i think i am in love with you, but i can't send you an e-mail without going through the motions to install that damn generic e-mail program onto my laptop, which i refuse to do. i do love you, paul, but there are certain things i still won't do for you. so now i am forced to declare my probable love for you on a public comment space, where it can be seen by everyone, including my boyfriend.

love,
hilary

[hilary]

dear paul,

i wanted to e-mail you privately to tell you that i think i am in love with you, but i can't send you an e-mail without going through the motions to install that damn generic e-mail program onto my laptop, which i refuse to do. i do love you, paul, but there are certain things i still won't do for you. so now i am forced to declare my probable love for you on a public comment space, where it can be seen by everyone, including my boyfriend.

love,
hilary

[Paul Neilan]

Hey Hilary, nice. You're my new secret girlfriend. Hopefully your boyfriend's illiterate, or at least very small.

And yeah Devin, I'm a huge hockey fan. I love the Rangers and I hate everyone else. I need to find a place to watch games this season. Berkeley isn't really known for its sports bars. I might have to move........Paul

[hilary]

paul,

despite my love for you, i did not intend to post that comment twice. now i look psychotic. but hey, you're probably into that.

i wish i could tell you that my boyfriend is both small and illiterate, but alas, i stupidly directed him to this very blog. i love you, joe! you are so huge and well-read!

(paul---call me!)

xxoo
hilary

[Matt]

Paul, I know you're a dude, and I know I'm a dude, but I don't care.

I want to hold you and tell you how much I love you. I want to make love to you under a starry sky on a chilly October night by a warm fire.

Well, actually I really don't want to, but, uh, a friend of mine does.

What I'm really trying to say is

Thank you.

[Devin]

I can't believe you like the Rangers, this news is terriable. As a Vancouver Canuck fan, I can never forgive the Rangers for beating us in the 94 stanely cup finals, but at least you like a good team. As long as you don't like the flames I can forgive you I guess

[Susannah]

Please write another book. I will buy many copies and hand them out to everyone.

I walked into a bookstore and randomly selected your book from a shelf, bought it, read it and laughed out loud the entire time, and have since distributed it to everyone I know.

I was incredibly depressed that you only had one. Please write more and make me laugh again.

[Bryan]

Paul I'm not much for reading, but after randomly selecting your book soley because of the cover I'm a changed man. I've never laughed so hard while reading a book and it sure put a new perspective on reading for me.

I nearly pissed my pants reading the section of Shane riding his bike to work. I can proudly say I got kicked out of a bar because a waitress over heard me telling the 'bus driver' joke about the 8 year old girl to my friends.

After reading the book I had this weird feeling that the book sounded like a town I'm currently growing up in. And sure enough I find out you lived in Portland. I'm disappointed I missed your reading I had no idea, and Powell's is only like 20 minutes away from my house.

Just wanted to say great job on the book and hope to see another!

[Justin]

It is sad how true your book is. It reminds me of a lot of the things in my own life that are so wildly unfair and yet real. When I walk around the town I live in I can see how lost I am and how lost our entire generation is. It is sad that there are still so many young people out there living their life based on a sitcom or a realy TV show that is shot in a state far far from my own. How reatrded can people get, it's 2007 time to wake up and shave that gritty Miami Vice hair cut off and start wearing clothes that fit properly. Anyways your book was amazing and i hope you can find it in yourself to write another one. THanks
JK

[Ryan]

Paul!

Dude your book was chillin on a shelf and i just bought it cuz the cover looked funny. So i read it and your book, was the shit! I need some answers from you, Like what happened to Bryce wife, and where did Shane end up going?..

Loved your book man. I never read and your book made me.

Thanks

Ryan

[Butthead]

You are a lazy bastard.

[Allen]

"You are a lazy bastard."

I think this is the best comment here. You need to write another book.

[luckywanderboy]

Salutations- i first encountered your book running through a local bookstore desperately looking for a restroom. Some shit worker noticed my less than sober swagger and directed me to be a paying patron or vacate his zone of proximity; I grabbed Apathy due to its bright cover being the only distinctly separate blur on the rack and proceeded to the latrine. After staggering to the rack to get a "fresh" copy I sobered and read...rinsed and repeated, thanks.

[Bob Bazer]

Paul,
I just wanted to say I loved your book. I picked it up by accident and didn't put it down until I was done with it. It was interesting and witty and the characters were amazing. It was the best book I've read in years. I look forward to your next book.

Bob Bazer
RSBazer@hotmail.com

[Chewbacca]

So, what the fucks up man. I love your shit but fuck, come on. write some more ya damn nig nog!

[14bk]

I'm sure you get this a lot, but your book changed my life. Please write more. PLEASE. I worked in a Christian bookstore for about 4 years and hated every employee and every task I was forced to perform with a smile on my face saying "Have a blessed day". One day I found the proof copy of your book in a pile and laughed at the cover. I picked it up and took it home. I read it in a day and laughed for weeks afterwards at work relating everything to Shane. Please, I've read the book at least 15 times. Some new material would be amazing. Oh, and my boyfriend is also in love with you and wants to have your babies. Thanks.

[Emily]

i work at that god damned movie theatre.